Answer to Prayers

I am not a religious gal. I do not go to church, I do not pray. My belief in the almighty is a shaky, bizarre mix of bits I've picked up along the way. That said, I'm accepting the intervention that came today to be outside of myself and will leave it at that.

Evie slept like crap last night, which in turn, means that her father and I also slept like crap. Up more times than I can count. This morning, she wouldn't eat, napped fitfully, I was at my wits' end. I started bawling. "I don't know what to do! Help me know what to do!" After a good 15 minutes of freaking out, I looked outside and decided to go for a run.

Any other day, it would not have happened.

I would have been too tired, to overwhelmed, too upset. But today, amid more craziness than I'd dealt with in a bit, I decided to go. I packed up a tired, cranky kid, called Ashley so someone could find me if we got attacked (I carry mace and have my gps on, too, but it's my defense against 127 hours syndrome--always leave a note, you know?) and ran my guts out.

It felt amazing. Granted, I'm still doing week 1 workouts, so I'm only running 1 minute at a time, but I did the workout twice, which means I ran for a total of 18 minutes. I went 3.3 miles. I needed it.

When I got home, my food choices were good. I didn't feel stressed out or crazy anymore. I realized that the best I could do was the best I could do. So, my kid might not nap like she should. My house won't get cleaned and I won't get out of my workout clothes, but I've taken care of her and myself as best I could. That made me feel really calm and okay with the situation.

I forget that she's just tiny, and that it's more than okay for me to not have my whole life together right now. I just need to focus on keeping her healthy, happy and safe, and need to do the same thing for me. Baseboards will get scrubbed soon enough, makeup will be applied when there's time. For now, the order of importance in my life (for me, not her or Veg) is eat well, exercise. Anything beyond that is delicious gravy.

Food today worked out really well. I made some non-fat granola, sweetened w/ pear juice (don't tell the kid I raided her juice stash), and put it with plain greek yogurt. I never in my life thought I would be eating plain yogurt and liking it, but man alive, do I!

Lunch was baked tofu w/ barbecue sauce and a bunch of sauteed veg. I dumped most of the veggies I had hanging out in the freezer into a frying pan w/ a little salt and pepper. Man. I have missed meals like this. I have missed tofu! It was so filling and delicious and healthy. It definitely kept me going for the rest of the afternoon.


Dinner, was not as healthy, but I still stayed within my daily points (I even had a few to spare!) I made one of Vegor's favorites--"Hot Hats". They're basically calzones w/o sauce, but since I had no pizza dough, I opted for puff pastry. I had one serving of puff pastry (back in the old days I would have eaten a whole sheet) w/ havarti cheese. Lordy. So unhealthy, yet so amazing. I was happy that I could indulge just a little bit and feel like I got what I wanted but also followed my own guidelines. I got a little hungry around 8 so had another serving of yogurt w/ Crofters and a banana mixed in and a couple pieces of toast.

I'd like all of my days to look a lot like today. Exercise, healthy eating, calmness, confidence. I'm trying. Day one of my #7daychip goal, down!

3 comments:

  1. Good job, Errin! That's fantastic! Remember, you can't take care of your family if you're not taking care of YOU.

    Sarah
    TheWeatheredWord.blogspot.com

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  2. Good work today, my friend. As I write, I am listening to my little baby cry instead of sleep, praying that she will soon, and reading your notes for the day. I also indulged in a bunch of mini powdered donuts earlier today that I'm not so proud if. Tomorrow is another day and my ambitious goal is to get through it. Thanks for your notes. I empathize and am inspired.

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  3. plain yogurt is great on EVERYTHING, especially with spicy curry things. your food looks great. and man, babies are rough, but you do such a good job.

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